Astralboobaby

Ok so I the actual councious event of acutally leaving my body contniues to elude me . I did have what I will call an odd experience during a meditation a few days ago and would like some feed back on it. I think it was an AP not a lucid dream but would like feed back.

Ok so I was in a state of awareness and it was dark. My eyes were closed and I was aware that I was lying in bed but not lying in bed (if that makes sense) I did begin to hear these buzzing noises I would say it was more like a swarming sound like bees than a electronic high pitched vibrating sound. I guess I had always anticipated the later.

In the swarming noise I began to have singular awarnessess of indivudual vibrations. These began to break away from the herd (lack of a better term) then these would zip by my at a high rate of speed. I was not frightened it just was. This occured several times by sinugular indivuduals with in the group.

As these beings that had 'zipped by me" kept doing so I noted that the sounds they were making were no longer a buzzing sound jumbled into a swarming noise but each I associated to a musical instrament. Like a violin, or trumpet. I think what they were showing me was that the buzzing noise was infact a "pitch" or musical note. Each individual was a harmoney with in the hive or swarm. To me is sounded like a swarming noise but infact that was because I just wasn't tuned into the acutal frequency.So it had to be slowed down and broken down so that I could understand it. Maybe this was their way of reducing any fear.

Ok so next I got the impression there was someone standing behind me with his hands slightly on my shoulders. His hands/palms reached down to my clavical bone. Nothing funny going on I think it was a proportion thing. He was blue I remember reaching up and touching him with my hands. It was an odd sensation. He was there and tactile wise he was transparent it was like putting your hands into some weird cool jelly that didn't leave a residue when u removed your hands. HE seemed liqiudy-solid enough for a shape to form but odd. It was a cool but pleasant sensation. I get the feeling that I was allowed to have the experience of reaching thru him but also had the tactile one as a solid object. What I remember most about the experience now was the jelly thing.

I think this may have been an AP. Reading back on my experience now I tend the think it was now by processing it more but would be greatful for insight or observations. I also know that I may be missing pieces that others can fill in on my event. Feed back always welcome.

I am immersed in beautiful music, tears are almost flowing out of my eyes, and I am reflecting:

I write from my soul the following letter to humanity:

"We will all get lost into ideas, concepts, principles, beliefs and thought patterns that never belonged to to us in the first place. Yet we lived a big portion of our life based on them; thinking they were our own.

In the end, we will all fall back to our own truth.

When all layers of borrowed truth have fallen away - You remain.

You is what the universe is waiting for, You is what the world is looking for. YOU !!!

I say unto you again: "if you want to know if something is true for you, look at how that something makes you feel. If it does not feel right, then it is not Your souls truth. We need to learn to listen to our feelings if we want to find back to ourselves.

If you think a thought that sounds true, but does not feel right to you, then that is not Your truth. Your soul and your feelings never lie, only mind is a liar."

- Soulwarrior (adam)

Q: "Who do I feel the music at some times, and dont feel the music at other times?"

A:  When you listen to music, dont listen with your mind, listen with your heart.

In order to listen to music with the heart, the mind must be still, silent and nondual - there must not be any thoughts in your mind that remove your presence from the music. Your mind must be present in the present moment, it must be 100% present in the music - your awareness must be grounded into the present moment of the music in a specific way. 

The moment you bring in the mind into the music, you have killed the music - it is no longer music, it is only sound.

Sound is mind; music is heart - Know the difference.

So the next time you find yourself listening to beautiful music, but you cannot feel the music, if it does not make you cry, if it does not move you, if it does not thrive you, if it does not create a movement in you, if it does not make you shiver; then know that you are listening with the mind, and you are not really aware and present in the music. 

NEVER fall into the trap of analysing music: "this is trance", "this is rock", "this is metal"...."this music is good because it was created in the 90s", or "this music is good but its simply not my style"..."i dont like this music because i have never liked this style"...or "i wonder how they have created this song...". This is dualistic and analytical thinking.

Music is music....it does not matter what kind of music it is, what year it was made, what genre it is.....

Music is simply a vehicle for presence and silence. It is a vehicle to the heart. It is a vehicle to the kingdom of heaven within you.

So know you know what the difference is between the moment where the music is felt, and the moment it is less felt. It is only the degree to which the mind is present between the two moments that bring about the difference between the two moments.

When you feel the music, it is because somehow you are more present and aware and grounded in the music. When you dont feel the music as much, it is because you are somehow less aware, grounded and present in the music. Your mind is not 100% present in the music, it is somewhere else.

"Just as there is an art of producing music, equally there is an art of feeling the music" - Adam D (soulwarrior)

"if the music dont make you feel any love or positive sensation in the body, then something is wrong in the way you are listening to it" - Adam D (soulwarrior).

"if you are grounded in the head, the music becomes sound. When you are grounded in your heart, sound becomes music. " - Adam D (soulwarrior)

--By Adam Damani [soulwarrior]

What creates soul loss?

When you experienced a serious trauma in your life, a part of your soul (the essence of who you are / your unique identity / your connection with you / the part of you that makes you feel alive) left your physical body and went back to the spirit world. It did so to protect you from experiencing the full hurt of the trauma; it would be too much to handle for you to experience the trauma in its fullness at that time.

So now, your soul is fragmented (all the different parts of your soul are not present inside of you). Your consciousness no longer have access to those parts of yourself. You have lost the full connection with yourself; and you are desperately trying to reconnect with your lost self.

So in order to feel alive again, you must retrieve the parts of your soul that has left you. It is possible to retreive the lost parts of your soul--Shamans can help you with this...

Author: Adam Damani (soulwarrior)

My homepage: soulloss.hemsida24.se

Links:

www.dianastone.com/shamanism.html

www.shamanlinks.net/Soul_Retrieval.htm

www.sandraingerman.com/soulretrieval.html

Book: Soul retrieval: minding the fragmented self (book)

This dream started out horribly wrong.I kept waking up from this nightmare, only to fall back into it. I don't really know where I was, but I was trying to talk to people in my dream, and everyone that I tried to talk to was really subtly freaking me out, because everyone seemed as if they suffered from some form of psychosis, or maybe it wasnt even that, but it was more of what I was feeling from other people if that makes sense, like I could feel that something was wrong with these people (they all had fear and darkness around them and in their eyes), and I somehow felt it was contageous, and eventually I tried to find a way to get away from all of these strange people. As I was walking in the dream, I started to feel like I was going into a very deep, intense meditative state, where I fealt things that are indescribable, except for the calm that I was in, and I stopped caring about these strange people around me. I just sat down like that was what I was supposed to do, and I was instantly surrounded by people that were all around my age (early 20s, late teens) and I was getting very positive feelings from them, like they were helping me, or protecting me. They all started to sing towards the dark place in which I had just come, and towards the strange people. And I only say they were singing because I couldnt really understand what it was, it was more of a vibration of sound if that makes any sense at all haha. The primary feeling that I was having was serenity. then of course I woke up

This is a shared experience between me and omnichromiatic, I MUST share this here....

Soulwarrior post: 

"I cried in nature today. All the tears ive been keeping inside just rushed out....and it was such a freeing experience. I cried for about 10-15 minutes NONSTOP. It opened my heart a lot....and it took away all the numbness of my senses...I felt alive again...

All senses hightened , smells, visions...all senses hightened and I was totally one with life....present and alive....

I highly recommend you go out in nature and CRY as many tears as you can cry...think thoughts of love and feel the beauty of nature...and feel love and compassion for yourself and feel deep appreciation for life and for all beings you hold dear.....and all tears come out....

But be aware: All repressed (supressed) emotions will come up in the surface after crying (all energy tubes in your body will open). In my case, a lot of HATRED came out 30 minutes after the cry. All unresolved issues and trauma feelings came out.....so it was lucky that all the trees in nature took my energy

Because when we cry, we take out all repressed emotions to the surface to be healed....

So CRYYY as much as you can.....it will open your heart....

After crying, i feel high,,i feel so blissful and extatic.,,,,and it transformed my whole being.....

The heart is the door to the kingdom of heaven....

May 17, 2013 at 12:40 PM Flag Quote & Reply

Soulwarrior

Member

Posts: 413

Not Hatred, I mean ANGER.

May 17, 2013 at 12:51 PM Flag Quote & Reply

OmniChromatic

Member

Posts: 438

Wow! its amazing that you posted this! I have just recently cryed, like similar in the same way you have two days ago. I shared my experience with a friend on here who could sympathize with me.

She too explained what had happened to me in the same way you have. When I cried soul worrior, I too began to cry about everything in my life. Alot of repressed and old emotions and feelings came back up...my TRUE feelings about everything came to the surface; feeling of saddness, loss, mourning, alienation, confusion etc. I truly felt and understand now after reading your post, that it was my HEART that was speaking and conveying how I really feel when I was crying. When I cried, I wanted to YELL, and SCREAM, and WAIL like a young child. I feel that I would have really let alot of old energy out if I had done so. I would have continued to cry if it were not for this friend asking about me, as I had promised to chat with them here.

After crying, I felt sooo much LIGHTER, and content. I felt more at peace than before, and had a gentle smile on my face. Crying really is cleansing and purifying when its sincere and genuine. Crying, and the tears/water that come along with it imo, are symbolic of the transformation and washing away or out of something thats old, obsolete, or repressed, Crying is a way for our bodies to naturally rid of emotions and energy that has currently affected us, or has been affecting us for a long time. Crying is one of the best Catharsis for the body.

Thanks Soulwarrrior! Ive been watching the information you have been projecting lately and I must say I am resonating with alot of it. Thank you thank you thank you! Keep being and doing you

Much Love <3

Greetings earthlings.

Today, I will share something i experimented with today (after watching the movie: dynamic meditation by Ozen rajneesh - contemporary OSHO).

He taught me something new today, that if i had known it earlier, it would have saved me from a lot of misery and trouble around meditation.

One thing I have noticed during the time i have meditated (4 years not to be precise) is that AFTER the meditation session, my breathing becomes heavier and worse (I get less air in my lungs) than BEFORE the meditaiton. Obviously i did something wrong for all of these 4 years of meditation. What did i do wrong? That is what will be the topic of this thread:

So what did I do wrong?

I breathed mechanically...i forced the breathe to be in a certain way....thus taking myself away from my natural (subconsious) breathe.

When you meditate, one of the greatest barrier you will come to meditation is that you have not learned the ART of breathing.

I advice you to learn the ART Of breathing, before you start ANY meditaiton.

So if you want to be a meditator, and benefit from its luxuries, you must EXPERIMENT with finding your natural breathe; to find your unique breathing rhythm.

Every person is unique,and therefore also has a unique breathing rhythm.

Now,....what happens when we meditate is.....WE breathe consciously....and alter the natural breathe by our INVOLVMENT in the breath.

We MUST not breathe consicously, or mechanically....or not even counting our breathing times etc...ALL that is nonsense.

We must learn to tap in to our natural rhythm ...when breathing is most easy and effortless for us.......

Let me share a short story.

I was meditating one day. I didnt succeed with the meditation (i was bored during my meditation and didnt feel any bliss or breathe coming in to my chest...). SUDDENLY I heard a SUDDEN and UNEXPECTED BANG sound, and I became SOO SCARED and jumped up our of fear. I thought someone was coming in to my apartment and was going to ROB me or something. Now...

LET ME TELL YOU A SECRET: THat sound helped me get into my natural breathe in an instant. My breating was no longer inauthentic....but NOW ....My breathe became AUTHENTIC for the first time that day. The feeling of intense FEAR took me SOO deep into the present moment....and it was sooo blissful to breathe that moment.

Now what can we learn from my story? The lesson here is: I was sitting and consciously breathing..TRYING to find the breathe ..and i couldnt find my breathe.....I was not breathing AUTHENTICALLY because I was TRYING TO BREATHE RIGHT AND CORRECTLY. In other words: THE FEAR ROOTED ME IN THE PRESENCE that i was looking for for almost 40 minutes of meditation.

MEDITATION CAN BE OUR GREATEST HINDERING TO MEDITATION. THink about that...

THERE ARE NO RULES when it comes to how to breathe....YOU MUST FIND YOUR OWN NATURAL RHYTHM when you breathe. This is SOO SO SO SO IMPORTANT !!! Dont do the same mistake as I have made...

I suggest that you watch this 4 series on how to find your NATURAL breathe....and how to open your emotional channels in your body as well to release ALL emotional trauma and repressed emotions stored in your body...ENJOY:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ipt_YWx8dzw

http://youtu.be/pIJHJzDQcRM

Ladies and gentlemen.

Many people have questions about the side effects of excessive masturbation, and I am here to use my own life and my own experiences with masturbation, to speak about some of the negative side effects it has had on me.

First, I have an announcement to make.

I have been a heavy masturbator to porn videos for almost my whole life, and I am getting to a point in my life where I am seriously needing to stop it and perhaps regain balance in the activity of masturbation.

I have just started to come to a point in my life where i no longer feel the orgasm any more the way i used to... ive gotten so used to the orgasm that I no longer derive any real pleasure from it as i used to before....

A negative side effect of this is that I have lost the natural attraction to girls. When I see a girl on the streets, or when I talk to a girl, I no longer feel the natural attraction that I used to (because all my sexual energy has been wasted by all the masturbation...).

This does not feel good, because without sexual energy, you cannot feel passion for a girl anymore. And without passion, you cannot enjoy feminine energies anymore. You begin to feel that a part of you has died.

The second reason why I feel I should stop masturbation is:

To become more productive and focused in my life, and in my goals.

I feel that the addiction to porn is making me less productive and focused. When the desire to masturbate takes me over, it is very difficult to find peace and balance in what I am doing - i am always pulled towards my desires to that I can no longer focus 100% on the present moment. There is always a feeling of procrastination and lazyness that follows it...

In other words: the desire to masturbate all the time, is making it more difficult for me to find peace in the present moment, to stay focused in what I am doing for a longer period of time, and this all makes me less productive and slows down my feeling of getting forward in life.

A third reason why I have decided to stop masturbation is:

It gives me a feeling of reducing people to objects. This also makes it more difficult to stay in a love vibration, it closes down my heart...and makes me loose connection to my inner truth. It disconnects me from God, it disconnects me from my inner light in some way. Its hard to explain. But it feels like its making me less pure in some way.....I would like to look at another person and feel love when im looking in their eyes ...and not feel that I want them to BED.

A fourh reason why I have decided to stop or slow down the rate of masturbation is:

BLURRED VISION and FEELING OF DISSOCIATION. One thing I have noticed after masturbation is blurred vision and dissociation feelings. My vision literraly gets blurred in some strange way.

Accompanied with this feeling or blurred vision comes a feeling of dissociation. I feel like im here, but im not really here (if you know what I mean). I feel that I am doing something, but im not really in what im doing. My mind is always subconsciously somewhere else (i am disconnected from the presence in subconscious ways...). Whatever i do, im not there..wherever i am, i am not here....a part of me has left me (and i feel lost from life)

In other words: It takes me away from the present moment, and disconnects me from the presence. It dissociates me from the present moment .....Its a very strange feeling. And its mostly a negative feeling.

With this feeling of dissociation comes a feeling of apathy and no-feelingness.

I feel less able to enjoy and FEEL the small things in life (a flower, a bird singing, a piece of music).

Accompanied with this feelign of blurred vision and dissociation comes a feeling of disconnection from life (i no longer feel the music, hear the birds, feel the air touching my body).

BLURRED VISION + DISSOCIATION + LOSS OF PRESENCE + DESENSITIVITY TO LIFE

These are some of the symptoms i feel after every masturabation session (ive just become self aware of these aspects for the first time and noticed that it has to do with the masturbation).

A fifth reason why i have stopped masturbation is: PSYCHIC ATTACKS

One thing I have noticed after masturbation or heavy sexual fantasy nights is....its always accompanied with a shadow entity or a negative sleep paralysis.....and when i wake up the day after i feel drained of energy and dissociated.....as if something has stolen my life force....I feel apathy and feeling of meaninglessness. I feel bored, apathetic, restless, hopeless...

These symptoms are ofcourse not MAJOR in my life; they are only side effects that I have noticed with masturbation. And its getting to a point in my life where its getting unbearable.

To summarize: Masturbation makes you less able to enjoy the small things of life....and make you less able to be present in body, mind and spirit.....it makes it more difficult to be in contact with your heart......it makes you less able to connect with feminine energies.....It makes you less able to fall in love with a physical girl......The list is endless.

A SEVENTH reason why i have stopped masturbation is:

IMPOTENCE when having physical sex with a girl.

I remember a few years ago, when i had sex with my last girlfriend. When I had sex with her, i noticed something strange happening (i couldnt work in bed). I just wasnt turned on by my girlfriend anymore.....

It made me less able to enjoy physical sex....because sex to me was always a MIND thing...Imagination thing....but to have sex physcally (that just didnt work for me)....

AS soon as i get in bed with the girl, i get turned OFF emediately.....because sex for me has always been a mental thing...

So excessive porn watching and masturbation make you less able to have a positive sexual experience with your partnes (it kills the sexual relationship with your partner).

So ladies and gentlemen...there are some of the side effects.....hope it helps....

Greetings fellow earthlings.

Today, i would like to talk about yet another important subject: "the importance of appreciating and feeling another person".

I have experienced a new revelation about the nature of todays world: "we have forgotten to FEEL each other"

People, we need to see, feel and appreciate each other more often. Because if we dont....we will all be discouraged from our own inner light and inner beauty (=spiritual death). We will loose ourselves in a vacuum. Perhaps that is a big contributor to todays apathy and feeling of meaninglessness in the world?

Even though many of you (myself included) are a source of appreciation to ourselves, and a source of encouragement unto ourselves, we still cant deny the need for us to be encouraged and seen by other souls. I mean, isnt that the meaning of life?... To see each other? To FEEL each other ...think about it...

Appreciation is a feedback mechanism that drives us, pulls us, motivates us.....reflects us. If that source of supply of appreciation is not regularly there, we will fade away and wake up feeling : What is the need of doing anything anymore? Why not just lie in the bed for ever? Noone is out there seeing me anyway,...so why continue with anything?

There is a spiritual danger involved in a culture that lacks appreciation. A big part of this is also that we have a culture that is collectivist (we have been programmed to appreciate parts of the collective). We have not been encouraged to see and appreciate the individual. So this is a cultural problem as well.

Ther is also a STRESS FACTOR involved in the lack of appreciation of each other. We are so stressed that we dont have the time and energy to see and appreciate each other. Many people may appreciate and see whta I do....but they just dont have the time, energy and ability to express what they truly are feeling appreciate-wise.

So this is a cultural problem as well ( lack of time, energy and dedication to appreciate).

The third thing i would like to say is: SELF ABSORBTION. When we are so absorbed in what we are doing , we also forget to take a deep breathe and to appreciate the work of another.

We must have a balance between self absorbtion, and seeing, feeling / appreciating another person for his or her unique strenghts and talens and contributions to the world.

Seeing another, is seeing God. Because everyone is a unique expression of Gods glory .....

Ask yourself this question: "how often do i think about a person, or several persons in my life...and feel uniquely for that person? How often do you FEEL for a particular person in your life?

Just some thoughts....

It is time for us to SEE and FEEL each other....othervise we will Fade away ....and we will loose ourselves....we will stop believing in ourselves....

My skype is: adam.damani (feel free to add me)....

The day we forget to appreciate,that is the day we have lost our souls....

Appreciation is the highest language of LOVE. Those who are able to appreciate, are able to LOVE